Deep in the Velvet Brown

60

By ExoticHippieQueen

I was sitting in my car, parked in a very small country town near the railroad tracks, waiting for someone, the late afternoon sun warming my face. Looking around town on a short drive, I saw that most of the town was empty. So many of the storefronts were vacant that a whole block was unoccupied in this three block town. Many of the small homes had for sale signs out front. The only place that showed any sign of life was Hillbilly Haven, a small bar by the tracks.


By ExoticHippieQueen ©2011



Deep in the velvet brown of her eyes,

I see a dream of a life not yet lived.

Tucked safely there, but restlessly,

the dream sparkles with the brilliance of diamonds.

Flecks of gold shimmer in those eyes,

but I see them only when the late afternoon sun

streaks across the fields onto the porch steps

and kisses her face into a squint.

Then I caress her face with my mind,

dream her dream,

hold my breath for the wanting

and live for the day

we can run far away.


Ghost town, bare storefronts, all for sale.

Even the railroad tracks want to leave their rails.

She's the only jewel in this farmer town,

Only woman I want to hang around.


Six pick-up trucks parked at the hillbilly bar.

They all live in town so they don't travel far.

One dollar drafts to forget where they live.

Farmers so poor they've got nothing to give.


The funeral home's just down the street

The curtains closed tight, the sign discreet.

They live and die here within one block.

Put in your time like you're punching a clock.


A town that complains about itself.

It's an empty carton on a broken shelf.

The last one picked in the baseball game.

A dying breed, no fortune, no fame.


A hopeless taste lingers on my tongue

The words to music that's no longer sung.

The smell of fear for what will not be

There's no one to care, just poverty.


When you turn up that corner down by the show,

You run out of town, there's nowhere to go.

Nowhere to go, but back to the bar.

Lucky for me, it's not very far.


Deep in the velvet brown of her eyes, I see a dream

of a life not yet lived.

If we don't leave now, we may be here forever.

Come with me.

Now.

It's not too late.

Yet.



Comments

Vincent Moore profile image

Vincent Moore Level 7 Commenter 3 months ago

What a powerful piece you just gave us, Wow. You took me through so many feelings as I watched from a short distance and the smoke curled from my smoke lingering on my lips. This stanza is magic.

"A hopeless taste lingers on my tongue

The words to music that's no longer sung.

The smell of fear for what will not be

There's no one to care, just poverty."

Well done, Bravo take a bow, Voted up and pressed all buttons but funny. 5 star rating SHARED and place in my Hall of Fame Poetry on my Pinterest page.

alocsin profile image

alocsin Level 8 Commenter 3 months ago

I like how you worked in three senses in the third to the last stanza "A hopeless taste..." Great stuff. Voting this Up and Beautiful.

Enlydia Listener profile image

Enlydia Listener Level 6 Commenter 3 months ago

Beautiful...the poetry and the picture. The picture captivated me first and then I had to read on.

writer20 profile image

writer20 Level 8 Commenter 3 months ago

wonderful poems. Voted up and awesome my friend for you great work, Joyce.

MazioCreate profile image

MazioCreate Level 4 Commenter 3 months ago

A vivid piece of poetry, where your descriptive phrases brought the small town alive for me. Probably more alive than what it is in reality. Thanks for sharing.

Randy Behavior profile image

Randy Behavior Level 2 Commenter 3 months ago

You always rock it. Nice!

ExoticHippieQueen profile image

ExoticHippieQueen Hub Author 3 months ago

Thank you so much, Ken. I am honored to be in your Poetry Hall of Fame! Pinterest is great, isn't it?

alocsin...........thank you for your comment!

writer20, thank you so much for reading and commenting!

MazioCreate, I love your name. This small town is all that I said it is and more (or maybe less). Thanks for your comment.

Randy Behavior.........good to hear from you. Thanks for reading and commenting. I will always remember you as my first commenter. Peace, babe!

ExoticHippieQueen profile image

ExoticHippieQueen Hub Author 3 months ago

Hi Enlydia Listener...I almost missed you. That would be terrible. Thanks for letting me pull you in!

Russ Baleson profile image

Russ Baleson Level 3 Commenter 3 months ago

Lovely! Took me on a trip. I've visited that town, a couple of times. Easy to get sucked in. It takes courage to leave and feels so good when you do. Excellent storytelling. Thank you. Russ

ExoticHippieQueen profile image

ExoticHippieQueen Hub Author 3 months ago

Hello,Russ Baleson. Yes, it is easy to get sucked in! Thanks for reading and commenting........

Senoritaa profile image

Senoritaa Level 6 Commenter 3 months ago

The poem is unique in essence, and has a very gentle flow. Its strange the kind of things that inspire us to write!

Poohgranma profile image

Poohgranma Level 6 Commenter 3 months ago

I thoroughly enjoyed this. I can see why Vincent added you to his Poetry Hall of Fame. Good stuff here!

ExoticHippieQueen profile image

ExoticHippieQueen Hub Author 3 months ago

Hi Senoritaa! Yes, it is strange what makes us feel the need to express it on paper and then share it. Thank you for reading and commenting.

Poohgranma, thank you so much for your comment!

MikeSyrSutton profile image

MikeSyrSutton Level 4 Commenter 3 months ago

Very nice! I enjoyed reading this. Voted up!

ExoticHippieQueen profile image

ExoticHippieQueen Hub Author 3 months ago

Thank you, Mike. I appreciate it.

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